Suicide Self Justified

As I stand I look around left, right, up and down hearing it again I ponder "devil? over yonder?" When I explored myself farther in depths, darks, shadows and sin reassuring its presence in my head "death? am I dead?" Further deep into abyss seemed to living in this bliss I opening wider an ever so lightful door of "Life" found myself standing in front of me, holding a knife Furthermore more farther into mind thought to be dreaming until I find He pulling me into deeper black looked me in the eye, stabbing I in my back Farthest now thoughts stand still bounded to try breathing before my last breath will I blurring life out of vision forced me to make I make one last decision No farther forth can I venture trapped to answering my question answered He stabbing forward again the knife left times up saying "that's life"