Suicide Killer
I saw my dreams disappear and my nightmares become realer
It's a losing battle because there's no winning with your emotions
Your tears fall and next thing you're swimming in the ocean
I swam around my demons, to murder my suicidal thoughts, so I'm the suicide killer
For a while I've been in a bad place
I can fake a smile, but it doesn't hide the fact my mind was in a sad state
I had constant thoughts of suicide and hurting myself
Made to feel like I wasn't deserving of help
So I never asked, I hid away with my demons
Opened the door, then Anxiety laughed and said you're not leaving
You wouldn't understand if you've never woke in cold sweats from a nightmare screaming
I'm moving forward but I've got old wounds that are still bleeding
My heart got colder, the more I went through
I learned you have to fight through obstacles even if they dent you
Heartbreak comes again and again so what would I heal for?
I'm just saying that because some of the pain is still raw
I put so much personal stuff in my poetry, maybe I'm wrong for this
Maybe I should hide my emotions,maybe my pain doesn't belong in this
But I'd rather share my thoughts to survive than take my own life
My happy ending isn't here yet, but I'm going to fight for it, so I'm going to make it home tonight
I saw my dreams disappear and my nightmares become realer
It's a losing battle because there's no winning with your emotions
Your tears fall and next thing you're swimming in the ocean
I swam around my demons, to murder my suicidal thoughts, so I'm the suicide killer
Copyright © Alex Duffy | Year Posted 2018
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