Stepmother Hell

Why do I care so much about health? Why is it when I see negativity I melt? I can't ever be seen or understood. I'm just told this and that is what I should. What I should do, regardless of my feelings. But its my mental health that continues healing. A grandma that smokes in bed with a 5year old. But me to care is too much, so I turn cold. A 5yr old that is over ninety pounds. But I say something and its just sounds. A 5yr old that wears clothes to fit a 14yr old girl. The feeling in my stomach is just a curl. But I say something and I get told, I know. But will the grandparents conscious ever grow. I get told I need to show her love and affection. But she's mouthy and spoiled so I show rejection. Due to the grandparents spoiling her. Their tendencies for her to never be here for sure. They fill her with a horrible diet. But I need to be extra quiet. I'm not allowed to say a word because I'm wrong. Its always the same old damn song. Shes 5 with a fatty liver. But the grandparents, food they still give her. She wants something anytime we go out. When told no its a shout. A spoiled brat is what she is, and I'm wrong. But its always the same damn song. My fiancee wants me to be better. But its hurts my heart everything in the letter. I go all in and put my 100% in. But then paw paw says I need to stop, I can't win. My fiancee says I need to try. But I do, and if I correct the child she starts to cry An unhealthy environment but I can't speak. Then if I do the grandparents freak. When its ok to fill a child's lungs with smoke is ok And the child smells like a ing ashtray. Maw maw thinks its fine. Not letting a child choose crosses a line. Letting a child sit on screen time forever. But she's obese, it should be more so never. I dont know what to do. What else is ing new.