Star Trek and Captain Kirk's Final Frontier

Kirk: ‘Lt. Uhura, come to my quarters at 1800 hours’
Uhura: ‘Yes captain, might I ask what’s up?’
Kirk: ‘Nothing now but something WILL be at 1800 hours’
Bones: ‘Jim, is this a medical issue?’
Kirk: ‘You bet your ***** it is, Bones’
Sulu: ‘Captain, a Klingon ship is approaching’
Kirk:  ‘Blast that sucker to smithereens, I got a date’
Chekov: ‘Captain, you’ll need protection on this mission’
Kirk: No problem Ensign, got a few here in my wallet’

Obi-Wan Kenobi: ‘May the force be with you’
Kirk:’ Thanks Obi, but you’re in the wrong contest’
Obi-Wan Kenobi: ‘This isn’t PD’s contest?’
Kirk: ‘HELL no, now SKAT will probably disqualify us’
Obi-Wan Kenobi: ‘Well, may the force be with you anyway’
Kirk: ‘Look Kenobi, nobody’s forcing ANYBODY here’

Spock: ‘Captain, I’m receiving a message from SKATfleet Command’
Kirk: ‘What Mr. Spock? And why do you always talk like that?’
Spock: ‘To qualify for the contest, the writer has to command the ship’
Kirk: ‘Damn it all! What the…FRONT AND CENTER WRITER!’
Writer: ‘Um…All hands on deck?...Anchors away?’

Uhura: ‘Ohh Captain KIRRK, it’s 1800 hours’…
Kirk: ‘Not now Uhura, I’m not in the mood!’
Uhura: Ohh Captain WRITERRR, it’s 1800 hours’…
Writer: ‘Kirk, you have the helm. I’ll be in my quarters’ 
Spock: ‘Fascinating’
Kirk: ‘Shut-up Spock’…

Tim Ryerson
Theme: Sexual harassment in the workplace
For SKAT’s contest
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

May Avatar
September 8, 2013 at 6:03 PM
funny stuff...congrats on your win
Adams Avatar
September 8, 2013 at 10:43 AM
lol loved the way you pieced this one together....congrats on your win :)
A   Avatar
September 6, 2013 at 8:57 AM
Hola, Tim, The Star Trek fan :-)~ , a nice and awesome win... always looking forward in reading and following all your winning poems... Luv~ LINDA
Morgan Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 9:09 PM
man this surely rocks! had or having a big smile while reading this. . you bet this is going to my favourite Congrats on your win. Morgan
A  Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 6:26 PM
Hi Tim Tim, , CONGRATS! thank you very much for this one... love your entry.... enjoy my newest poem :) SKAT
Duncan Avatar
August 29, 2013 at 6:29 PM
This is so funny and great, Loved watching Star Trek, I still love William Shatner
Eastman Avatar
August 19, 2013 at 9:53 AM
You win hands down!... in my book. This was great! Live long and prosper!
Macfarlane Avatar
August 12, 2013 at 1:52 PM
Tim, this is hilarious!! I laughed out loud and can't stop smiling. You could write a spoof script for Star Trek, too bad Leslie Neilsen wasn't still alive to act in it. Awesome entry and write!
May Avatar
August 9, 2013 at 2:04 PM
You did a great job with the theme...I like how you put in Obi....that was funny
Hendricks Avatar
August 8, 2013 at 7:35 PM
Hahahaha, I'm still laughing!!! What's going on in that head of yours (lol)? You come up with the craziest writing. Right on, Mr Entertainer. YOU ROCK!!!!!!!!! Licia :-)
Jones Avatar
August 7, 2013 at 5:58 PM
Oh my gosh.....I'm still laughing......:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) I know just enough about these shows to know you did an awesome Job here Tim...better than alien vs predator! Haha
Bauer Avatar
August 7, 2013 at 9:34 AM
this is hilarious! well done!
Ryerson Avatar
August 6, 2013 at 7:37 PM
Kirk: 'STAR TREK RULES!!!'...Writer: 'Shut-up Kirk, that's MY line'...
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace