Sometimes I Feel Like a Fatherless Child
I feel as though I was born into a jungle not quite prepared for the wild. Sometimes
I ponder do I have to give into account for your sins. Somehow I think your early
departure clouded my judgement when it comes to my choices in men. I cant
pretend that I knew how your dying would affect me. It left me wondering if you
might've lived how different my life could have been. As I look in the mirror I get a
glimpse of your smile in my reflection. Why has it taken me years to try and
overcome my fears.No amount of glue can repair the permanent tear you left
imprinted in my heart. Why was I searching for you in them.Did it come from the
unoccupied space that was left after your death. You suffered while exhaling your
last breathe,Oh how I wept,Like you were that missing step I refused to take.Like a
solid punch to the chest,I know now God took you from me for the best.Still tears
wouldnt allow me to rest.I guess at the age of ten I took on a burden of looking for
my father,dad and he was dead.Oh how I wish I could re-write your life and re-edit
all the bad decisions you made,So maybe you've would have stayed. How did I pray
for the cancer to go away,yet it stole not only your health and but also your
soul.Thankfully God had more goals and for me write this chapter into life so I can
attain the goal of being a voice for more wounded souls.No longer yearning for your
arms to reassure me and console my world as a whole.Like a dove wings dipped in
gold,I have a story I just shared to rid me of feelings as the fatherless child,Grown
as a adult now,and no more blaming you,me! Just as a cage bird this poem has set
me free from all negativity!
Copyright © Nasheena Williams | Year Posted 2011
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