Someday I Will Love Lucia Ferris
after Rader/Schwartz/Vuong/Reeves/O’Hara
oh lucia.
if only there were someone
who loved you.
and not the version of yourself
you know they want to see
but the you that you have locked in your mind
you want the connection
without the commitment because
i love you is a promise
that you can’t keep.
so let it go
the truth can
set you free
the void is wider
than you could ever know
breathe in the fresh air
reflect
upon yourself. ask why
something about you refuses to give up tearing ribbons
into shreds, marring the smooth facade with evidence of your broken pieces
theres no hiding it now
do you want to be happy?
do you want to get better
or do you just want to be
gone?
tether your temporary form
to the solid ground
nothing ever lasts forever
claw at the dirt until your fingernails are bloodied
and fall into the same earth that will hold your corpse
you cannot wait to die
because you are scared to live
in a place that holds no love for you
you are nothing special
but some people have made you their
world so it’s too late
to push them away
before they can care. scars are like tattoos
everyone sees them
but no one knows the meaning behind their marks
Copyright © Lucia Ferris | Year Posted 2023
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