Snazziest Wheels In Town
The very first automobile that I ever owned,
Was a 1937 Ford sedan that was many times preowned!
I bought it when I was a junior in high school as I recall.
It would do about 55 miles per hour with the pedal to the wall!
I paid two hundred and fifty bucks for that snazzy set of wheels.
I worked at a grocery and a gas station to pay for that deal of deals!
Now, in my feckless youth, a plain lookin' vehicle wouldn't do,
So I adorned it with useless gewgaws to express my point of view!
First thing I installed was a fanciful knob on the steerin' wheel,
And not a few times it rapped my knuckles and made me squeal!
I had a pair of chrome spotlights to give it a modicum of sex appeal!
On the tailpipe was a gadget that projected a thunderous peal!
I had twin aerials installed, one for show and one for radio operation.
Attached to each was a foxtail that evoked curious fascination!
I affixed rear wheel fender skirts and mud flaps with red reflectors,
White sidewalls, fancy gearshift knob and feelers to act as curb detectors!
I had a guy install a horn that played, "Mary Had A Little Lamb!"
Cops thought it a nuisance and on many occasions it got me in a jam!
Dad told me that buyin' such stuff was foolish but I was havin' a ball!
(Years later, I myself found that you can't tell a teenager anything at all!)
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
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