Smile Again

I want to be up and happy and feeling my best. But I don't get it, I wake up and feel depressed. I have nothing to be in a bad mood about. But I just want to sit here and not go out. I am missing so many good times, it isn't fair. All my body and mind say is I don't care. In my mid-twenties and already want to cash in? I want this life, I want it to come out and begin. Maybe there is a chemical imbalance in my brain. Trapped inside and its sunny, but in here only rain. Yeah I can go to the doctor and he can give me some pills, but the effects are weight gain, moodiness, and some people it kills. I just want to be able to smile again. Or at least know I can and when. Its so hard to tell people nothing, but everything is wrong. And everyday gets harder and it takes so long, I just want to smile once more, maybe walk on the ocean shore. Just make it through today and survive. Just be happy that I am alive.