Silence Between Us Tragic Heroes
I hate that I can write this
Because it means on one level or another
One of us failed the other
Or perhaps we failed ourselves
Did I ever know I'd be your tragic hero?
It's hard to predict when digging oneself out of mud takes precedence
Exhuming myself from my then-current title
And plot points that led me to be buried
It's astounding how a porcupine can truly live
Where the two stand at quill's length
Cautious yet enamored
Wincing as small wounds get deeper
It's further astounding that I parade myself as God
And that I've convinced myself so thoroughly of the lie
That even when hiding the simplest thought as deep as possible
You still managed to cling to the belief
Follow the god that failed you
Or is it you who has failed God?
Has any slight actually been committed
Or are we both so hopelessly tangled in our own stories?
Did I ever know you'd be my tragic hero?
Equal parts pity, equal parts fear
And I let my sun shine bright
With the basic facts of what you are
To fetishize the basic tenants of human courtesy
Did I unintentionally put you on a pedestal?
But I know you've always subscribed to the same flavor of fear
With its ever more generous delivery dates
Perhaps I'm the one being infantilized
How strong are your convictions that you're so convinced you could kill me?
Through daring to show emotion when I beg you to be flamboyant with it
Exactly how hard are you worried you'll hit me?
Thus in the end, we are tragic heroes
You mistake silence for a child's crib
A permanent safe spot for me
To sleep when you're afraid to open up
So here I am, again a tragic hero
Is my mistake thinking that love is for me?
When simply existing is enough
To turn the brightest dawn into dusk.
Copyright © Derek Chos | Year Posted 2018