Shlurp - Nursery Rhyme - Kids Story

[In UK English, Bath sounds like Barf not Baff, Laugh is Larf, not Laff etc. Apologies if the rhyme fails in other locales] Don’t pull the plug out when you’re sitting in the bath If you do the devil’s imps are gonna have a laugh You'll be sucked down the plughole and you’ll squeeze around the bend And you’ll be in the hot place when you get to journey’s end Don’t pull the plug out when you’re sitting in the bath Whether you’re a school kid or the navy’s chief of staff Beneath the soapy water with that plughole looking wider You see a leg, then three, then six, a massive hairy spider So when you're sitting in the bath, please do not pull the plug That tiny little whirlpool’s gonna make you go glue glug If it grabs your biggest toe and yet you pull it free That big rat on the end of it is having tootsie tea So if you’ve pulled the plug out and got sucked out of the bath You’ll need to grab some flotsam to construct yourself a raft They empty all the sewers out into the seven seas The message in that bottle reads ‘did you wash your knees?’ And then it says, I see you pulled the plug out when you shouldn’t I tried to pop it back in but the danger meant I couldn’t You might think going down the plug hole would be quite a lark But in the bath (and please don’t laugh) we’ve got a great white shark. 14 April 2021 Contest: Nursery Rhyme (or kids story) 4 Sponsor: Eve Roper