Shechem's In the Kitchen With Dinah
(best when sung)
Shechem’s in the kitchen with Dinah
He’s in trouble, don’t you know? oh oh oh
Shechem’s in the kitchen with Dinah
Simeon’s about to blow
See, Dinah was Jacob’s daughter
Shechem wanted for a wife
He took her much too early
And started all the strife
Shechem’s father went to Jacob
He asked for Dinah‘s hand
They’d intermarry daughters
Make peace throughout the land
Jacob’s sons got wind of this
And they got really pissed
They came up with a little plan
A sort of grown up bris
The plot was circumcision
There’d be no deal without
Shechem’s dad convinced his men
He must have had some clout
“See, we’ll marry their daughters
They’ll do just the same.”
So Hamor’s men all lined up
They put skin in the game
A few days soon thereafter
When everyone was sore
Simeon and Judah walked right in
And killed them with the sword
Then Jacob grew quite angry
“You’ve brought our family shame
The Canaanites will come after us
And blot out our good name.”
His sons weren’t having any
Saw no need for redress
The honor of their sister
Was worth this awful mess
Shech went in the kitchen with Dinah
It was a costly trip, oh oh oh
Thought that he could dine for free
Her brothers forced the tip
(from Genesis 34)
Copyright © Jeff Kyser | Year Posted 2022
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