She Wasn'T Ready
His threats weren't fake, like she thought
He tried to take his life....
He said that he would, she just laughed it off.
Then he swallowed the poison, and let
it eat away at his insides......
She didn't believe him....
She didn't want to think he
would ever be that cruel.
She didn't know what to do
or say....
She was barely out of middle
school.
(How can a thirteen year old girl
Be thought of as a woman?
How could he have treated her
as if she were so much older?)
She didn't grasp the concept, or understand
his strange ill will....
She was lost and oh so confused, thinking,
he would climb over that gruesome hill.
He wanted her to be with him....
She could only tell him no.
She wasn't ready for that kind of
commitment,
she still needed her time to grow.
He ran away and hid..... went behind
the building to take a swig.
A swig of some liquid acid, and told her
if he couldn't have her, then he didn't
want to live.
The girl stood there thinking, "oh my God!"
what has he done?
She thought he was only bluffing...
But he wasn't...
The deed was done.
The ambulance, it came that night......
She cried, and fell upon her knees.
For had she known he needed help,
she would have tried her best to see.
He survived but had to be taken away
for a few months, and needed time to heal.
They talked on the phone every night, she tried
her best, to keep in touch with him.
She walked to a phone booth just to call him,
each and every day....
He came home about a month or two later,
Neither one knowing what to say.
They hugged awhile, and she kissed him sweetly
and he smiled into her eyes......
She knew it was over, as did he.... and somehow
without speaking the words, said their final goodbye.
She hasn't seen him since the fall, of 1982....
but she's never forgotten what he did that night,
It is always on her mind..... it haunts her still.
So let that be a lesson to all you girls
who think you're so grown up....
When you are only thirteen years old, dating
guys nineteen, you just aren't ready for that stuff.
This is a true story.
I know it is true, because the
she in the story.....
Was me.
(This is a very personal and delicate piece, tread lightly please.)
Thank you.
Copyright © Julia Hill | Year Posted 2007
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