She Waits

She contemplated her imperfection Her eyes gauged on the mirror's reflection with fear; with let-down. Dispirited as a vanquished exile flower uprooted- her story an epic memoir of misplaced hearts, at Christmas. An endless recital of Holiday songs where the music had lost any meaning. Where do I fit in? Where do I begin again? Who am I to be on Christmas at sixteen? Should I wear red or green? Christmas was the hardest time of all haunting recollections when she was given away landing in many others arms for many years- she would wait in a loving stranger's house providing her care. And every year she faced her truth when motherly promises would inevitably evaporate while she waited for her to call-for-sure This Time......This Year!!! Just as she said she would. Come spend the holiday with her- so many times before. For years she gave her heart without reservation to restore her make belief trust. So she stood waiting at every door. She lay crying on the floor. She knew what had gone on so many times before.... She waited... Holding her hands clasped for many hours warming the chair that offered no comfort. Praying for the one gift that would change her life- the face she had imagined that had given her life The loneliness that was given her as a child The emptiness that took away her smile Were the 'real' gifts she had to receive On this the blessed day of love and goodwill With sad tidings She waits still.... December 19, 2019 The Darker Side Christmas Poetry Contest Sponsored by Richard Lamoureux Revised 12.30.19 Beyond The Niceties Of Christmas Poetry Contest sponsored by Bobby Burns