Shattered . . . Changed . . . Became Whole

To fall is what I am afraid of
Afraid to love, and be loved by someone else.
Entered that game before,
Been fooled, hurt and shattered into pieces
Never expected that way.
Never imagined that it’ll be like that.
Hurt thyself, and hurt by someone else.
I stop.
Unsensitive to the love that surrounds me
By this, I hurt them, killed them
Took away the happiness that was in their faces
The love that makes them live their lives.
I changed.
Try to turn back time from where I stopped.
But there’s no such thing
Regrets kept on lingering, creeping inside my soul.
It killed me, leave me for dead, like a corpse in a war.
Shattered like before, no one showed me the light
No one gave me the love I needed.
I live, alone, no one to turn to, no one to be with.
Then he came.
Proposed something differently.
But I was afraid.
I can’t give my trust to a stranger.
I can’t lend him something so precious
I am afraid to be broken, broken and shatterd once again.
But he waited, waited so patiently.
Like them I gave him pain, I tried to break him
Try to make him realize that he was wrong
His feelings are wrong.
He shouldn’t give his heart to someone who can break it so easily
Then.
I showed compassion, I start to care.
By then I became soft, and vulnerable once again
Still I am afraid.
But every moment with him is a memory
He changed me, changed me completely
He gave back the person I was.
Now I am afraid, afraid to let him go.
I trust him, and still there he is.
With me.
Living life with someone who was shattered but he made whole
Brought back the pieces, every shattered pieces.
Now.
I love him.
And I’m sure it’ll last forever.

Copyright © Carel Jean Abulencia | Year Posted 2008

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