Shahana Jackson | + Follow Poet |
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Shades of Black

I remember way back when I was real young, my brother and I used to have adventures 
    and we wouldn't even leave the house.

    Games full of hide and seek and afternoon cartoons. 
    We were two peas in a pod like twins at least that's how we bonded.

    All the neighborhood kids loved us, were addicted to our energy.

    It wasn't until we grew up a little that I started to notice the difference 
    between us.

    I was light as day, he was dark as night. 

    Same father same mother just out mind sets were different. 

    I got treated like a white girl even though I was full of soul. 

    I begged for his darkness because I was naive.

    To him it didn't matter. 

    He belonged to our family no matter the difference in color.
 
    I would stand by him just so people would see that I was black.
 
    Even though I knew every song, I knew how to dress, and shake just like a video
    girl some of the ignorant still just couldn't except that I was one of them.

    I got teased and beat because I had brown colored hair that fell down my back like 
    long silk. 

    My skin so light eye shadow wouldn't show when I put it on. I would stare in the
    mirror and wish for a darker complexion. 

    But this was me, I lived a few blocks from the projects, a beautiful neighborhood 
   with lots of houses we were upper class but still knew the struggle.

    A few gun shots here and there but my block was like the suburbs compared to them 
    mean streets that I had never crossed. 

    But I went to school right in the project area, you turned a corner and you were 
    right in the middle of it.

    I've seen many fights, weed smelling bathrooms, girls bringing knives 
    to school, alcohol in the cafeteria milk.

    I experienced it all right with them. I even had an temper that got my butt 
    kicked sometimes.

    But it was always the same comment you can't be black, maybe Hispanic but not black.

   I would always wonder why, just because I was light to me this made no sense in the
   world. 

   But I've grown up now and it doesn't bother me anymore because I love my curves and I
   know that there are different shades of black in the world.

   Especially since now a  dayslight skinned girls are the new trend.

Copyright © Shahana Jackson | Year Posted 2005

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