Selfish Longing

It's like there is a vacuum in my heart
Pulling everything tight
And as the pain increases
I feel I should tell someone
But these are selfish pains
And I can't admit to a soul
That without anything wrong
I am hurting and ache with sadness
Particularly I can't let anyone know
How I'll feel better if noticed
It's so shameful to admit
I teeter so close to despair
That I need reminders of love
The answers lie in the past
Centre of the world or cast aside
I plunge into childlike feeling of loneliness
Where I'm freefalling until I zone out
And if my hand is grabbed mid fall
To tell me I deserve this space
Then I believe it, it rings true
Held. 
With pain reinforced
      You deserve this
      I don't understand you
      Why do you do this
I don't know
But I could be better in an instant
If only someone knew how I felt
Copyright © | Year Posted 2023


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