Self Made Heartache
My heart no longer beats as it did before
With each thump there’s a rattle you now hear
You wonder at first then you realize
The look in my eyes makes the reason clear
It’s from the pieces of my broken heart
That were just to far beyond any repair
The only one that I can blame for this
Is none other then me causing my despair
There’s something wrong with me
Hidden deep in the wiring of my mind
So many have tried to discover it
But there’s nothing they’re able to find
People have loved me deeply in life
And for that alone were pushed away
I can still see how their faces looked
Every drop of pain was there on display
All my emotions are covered by a mask
So they will never know how much I care
I will never put my heart up on exhibit
My feelings I simply refuse to bare
And I hate myself for being this way
Wanting to cause this self made headache
I’ve made this road rougher than needed
And though it hurts it’s not too much to take
Ruining my life has become my addiction
I enjoy when the pain gets to be so severe
I’ve slowly torn my life apart unnecessarily
So I do this out of hatred or is it fear
Copyright © Mathew Sturgeon | Year Posted 2025
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