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Self Made Heartache

My heart no longer beats as it did before 
With each thump there’s a rattle you now hear
You wonder at first then you realize 
The look in my eyes makes the reason clear

It’s from the pieces of my broken heart 
That were just to far beyond any repair
The only one that I can blame for this 
Is none other then me causing my despair 

There’s something wrong with me 
Hidden deep in the wiring of my mind
So many have tried to discover it
But there’s nothing they’re able to find

People have loved me deeply in life
And for that alone were pushed away 
I can still see how their faces looked 
Every drop of pain was there on display 

All my emotions are covered by a mask
So they will never know how much I care
I will never put my heart up on exhibit 
My feelings I simply refuse to bare

And I hate myself for being this way
Wanting to cause this self made headache 
I’ve made this road rougher than needed
And though it hurts it’s not too much to take 

Ruining my life has become my addiction 
I enjoy when the pain gets to be so severe
I’ve slowly torn my life apart unnecessarily 
So I do this out of hatred or is it fear

Copyright © | Year Posted 2025




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Date: 8/19/2025 11:55:00 PM
I can relate to this. You're going through life looking for that right one, only to end up sabotaging it before they do. You have to keep your guard up so no one gets close enough to see where you're most vulnerable. Extremely emotional read. Thank you for sharing.
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