Scared

I'm scared. More scared than you could ever imagine I could be. I try to hide it. But it's still there. I'm scared of the future. I want to be grown up, but I don't. I don't want to file for insurance, I don't want to apply for college, I don't want to apply to any where and get turned down. I'm scared of everything right now. I'm scared of getting old,I'm scared of not living my life to the extent that I know I could manage. I'm scared of dying. i'm just scared at this point in my life. Really, really scared.