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Saying My Peace

Yes, I’m the blame, taking full responsibility, It’s a tragic life and love story of mine, no need to try to explain it’s a waste of time.  Others are going to say and believe what they want, thinking they know my life story.  I’m in a category of my own, taking the blame. I have always been alone, for so many years  I’ve cried my secret tears without anyone rubbing my back.  Taking on those with verbal and some physical attacks.  I have sacrifices that I have made realizing that I’m no different from anyone else.
I won’t say that “I’m A Good Christian” placing it in the front of my name.  Claiming to be so perfect, when I have always known the truth. Perfect …  none of us will never be.  I’m just me, some people claim to see who I am or what I have done, spare me with the gossiping lips from so many.   Better yet bring it to me, giving me your worst.  Allow me to recycle their words turning it against them.  Verbal attacks like hell fire I desire to hurt for the motivation to help build me.  I’m not the worst thing that happened, they knew what went on, what was said, thinking the opposite, she is no Angel you keep her.
My blood line will live and be just fine.  Mothers be mothers to your children doing the best that you can, not allowing society control and pressure your thoughts about having sex.  Be careful and thoughtful of who you are, your children are watching when you think they’re sleep.  Trying to satisfy yourself through late night creeps who kiss and tell There isn’t a clear scent of heaven just hell.  Love yourself without the sexual invites be aware of who you invite into your home creeping delights stalking your children’s life.  Your parents would turn in their grave if they knew the truth.  I’m not judge nor saint just listening to the voices of my heart.
Last, I can be the villain, just know all I ever wanted to do was survive with love and understanding.  There were agreements made so I stayed sleeping with enemies that clam to be friends, family to me.  All I can do is ask how or why when truths were told, turned to lies I ended up the worst thing walking and heavily misunderstood.  The talks about closure, this is mine opening up my soul and heart clearing the air.  Saying my peace because now I am living my life not so that you understand but so that your aware.  I share what I feel with intentions to free some part of my own soul in a world always cold.

Copyright © Noble Smalls | Year Posted 2016

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