Santa"s Works Night Out. a Cautionary Tale
At last it has arrived,
let there be no doubt.
That everyone goes crazy
at the Christmas staff night out.
Now Santa took the sleigh.
He did not stop to think.
For that was very foolish
with all that food and drink!
Tooth fairy looked real nice
so did the pantomime dames,
but Grinch was asked to leave
for calling Santa names.
The leprechauns told anecdotes
in the spirit of Bob Hope.
The snowmen all got stoned
by passing round the dope.
Santa told rude jokes!
and some were even funny.
But everyone avoided
that randy Easter Bunny.
Jack Frost he was concerned,
told the Elves what he was thinking.
"That Santa"s getting drunk,
he is doing to much drinking."
When the meal was over,
the MC he did stand .
"Will you welcome live on stage,
The Boogie Man and his band."
The celebrations ended.
"Get on your merry way."
Santa staggered out
to try and find his sleigh.
The reindeer headed home
they knew the way to go.
They did not stop to think,
to take it kind of slow.
Santa started singing
a chorus of Wild Rover.
When flashing lights appeared
and he was soon pulled over.
"Lets see your drivers licence
and please put out that ***."
"Step out of the vehicle
and blow in to this bag."
Oh Santa was locked up.
You should have heard him wail.
"You have to let me out,
you have to give me bail."
His sentence will be soon
lets hope the courts a fan.
For what will happen next year?
If he gets a driving ban.!
Poor old Santa Clause
it is a sorry tale.
He got community service,
instead of going to jail!
By all means leave a carrot.
A glass of milk I think.
But don"t encourage Santa
by leaving out a DRINK!
© Ned Flanders
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