Santa Confesses All

[FLUSH = Fearless League of Unlikely Super Heroes] ______________ A communique received today from one Nicholas Saint Said that he had misbehaved, an honest chap he ain’t He thought that he could ruin FLUSH by framing their inventor And destroy the kudos of an old saloon frequenter He sees the error of his ways and now must tell the truth For nobody, except for fate pushed Santa off the roof He tried to frame the Mayor, you see, with evidence that’s fake And getting Mister Flood sent down? The icing on the cake But then Ms Logan got involved, she owns the best saloon He likes a brandy everyday, he’s always there at noon See, Santa battled justice using methods out of hand But he won’t fight Ms Logan for he fears he might be banned It’s time, he says, to tell the truth, for we deserve to know What took place upon that roof, it’s quite a tale of woe For Mrs Jones at number three was so scantily clad Her curtains were wide open, oh, what a view he had He couldn’t help what he could see but hoped he would see more And then she dropped her nightie… for the wife from number four But when they looked right up at him he tried a quick step back He didn’t jump off on a whim, he slipped… but what went crack? To his shame he’d been ‘excited’ he asks that you don’t scoff He’d landed on his front, you see, and broke his manhood off So now if you should hear him speak, his tone no longer low His big gruff voice is now a squeak; he’s lost his Ho Ho Ho! He had to frame somebody else because where he comes from You cannot work with little elves when you’re a peeping Tom