John Hamilton Poet Rhyme

Saffron Sun

Saffron sun


Your amber-umber eyes, penetrate me
as saffron sun sets on faces, ashen
Your suspicious mind raves with jealousy
as pumpkin winds chill our summers passion


September 3,2020

Excerpt taken from my poem Autumn's desires
originally written September 16,2017

John Derek Hamilton

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Janice Canerdy September 21, 2020 at 7:51 AM Such a vivid description of love going wrong, John! CONGRATS on your win. Janice John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 11:55 AM Thanks Janice

Sigrid Ermine September 20, 2020 at 10:09 PM Okay!.... This needs a couple of reads to divulge more emotion. Very nicely unwound tale of love and loss. I pick up a lot of tension and sadness from the mistimed venture. Beautiful work. Look forward to reading AD to absorb more of the story. Congratulations, well earned, John!! John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 7:20 AM Thanks Sigrid, glad your assessment was positive, I'm sure you'll like the original from which it was taken.

Kim Rodrigues September 20, 2020 at 5:33 PM Congratulations, John! Lovely imagery with those pumpkin winds! John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 7:19 AM Thanks Kim, glad you liked it!

Elaine George September 20, 2020 at 4:08 PM LOVELY 4 LINES JOHN, MANY CONGRATS ON YOUR WIN. ~Elaine John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 7:19 AM Thanks Elaine

Andrea Dietrich September 20, 2020 at 2:09 PM So glad to see this on the list!! Congrats to you! John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 7:18 AM Thanks Andrea a nice surprise for sure!

Jeanne Mcgee September 20, 2020 at 10:43 AM How the colors of fall are woven with love in splendid words. Congrats John on your win. John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 7:18 AM Thanks Jeanne

Sam Kauffman September 20, 2020 at 9:09 AM What a dynamic use of color, John! I like the contrast of color to "ashen" and the weaving of the seasons into the passing of the summer love. Really nicely done! Congratulations on your winning placement. John Hamilton September 21, 2020 at 7:18 AM Thanks Sam what a nice surprise I'll have to check the winners circle, I didn't know Greg had judged it already!

Susan Ashley September 7, 2020 at 10:45 AM John, I remember the original poem, "Autumn Desires", that this verse comes from, as we both share a love of the term 'saffron sun'. This stunning stanza is even more striking in its beauty and potency as a stand alone poem. A great choice for the contest. Best wishes for a win and warmest wishes for you, dear poet.. ~Susan Susan Ashley September 7, 2020 at 11:24 AM Your sweet sentiments touch my heart, my friend, and I'm sure this one will be at the top of Greg's win list :) I will look into your contest for sure and see if I can conjure a sonnet that's worthy.. John Hamilton September 7, 2020 at 11:14 AM So nice to have you back Susan, we've missed your artistry, thanks for your kind words, let's see what Greg thinks, would be great if you wrote for my new contest, look forward to your entry! Take care John

John Fleming September 4, 2020 at 10:58 PM Just read through your original poem, Autumn's desires...I think, with your talents, this could be made rather nice when set to music...a slow, sort of crooning song sang in a low and deliberate fashion might suit well. Has your unique writing style splashed all over it, John! G.L in the contest. :) john John Hamilton September 5, 2020 at 6:21 AM Thanks John, I'm so grateful for your taking the time to read and comment on some of my older poems as well. I find it interesting that you think some of my poems could also be songs...interesting...very interesting!

Andrea Dietrich September 4, 2020 at 2:30 PM oh I just love all that colorful autumn imagery going on in this poem. wonderful! John Hamilton September 5, 2020 at 6:19 AM Thanks Andrea

Kim Rodrigues September 3, 2020 at 4:26 PM Love this, John! Wondrous colors of Fall! John Hamilton September 3, 2020 at 5:27 PM Thanks Kim glad you came by today, did you hear my new song today?

Vijay Pandit September 3, 2020 at 12:23 PM Wonderful metaphors John...in these bittersweet verses of romance. John Hamilton September 3, 2020 at 1:19 PM Thanks Vijay You always seem to be the first to comment, I am grateful for your kind support!