Vince Suzadail Jr. Poet Couplet

Prostrate Exam

I never felt so embarrassed my dear
It’s not like they were checking my ear
He gave me a gown with ties in the back
Is that what they mean by saying no to crack
He said please lay over on your side
I saw his big hands, that’s when I cried
He said there are no lumps that I can find
I said your breaking my behind
He said we’ll go through with a camera when I’m done
I said I hope it’s not a hand held one
He asked can you hold on I’m almost through
To keep from flying that’s what I’ll do
I can’t believe you are in so much pain
It’s because your nurse forgot the novocaine
He said shame on you screaming like that
I said you’re either criminally insane or a democrat
He said the test is complete and you are all clear
I said thank you doctor, see you next year.

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Ed Coet August 23, 2008 at 10:28 AM LOL funny! Been there. Done that. It's the results that matter. No humor when something is found. -ED-

Karen Feist August 15, 2008 at 6:44 PM Very funny, Vince. My husband just went for his last week. He requested our tiny Asian woman doctor. Need I say more? Great write. Glad all was ok. Also glad that you are taking care of yourself. love, Karen

Cecil Hickman August 14, 2008 at 7:36 PM a very well written piece about such a needed but humilating exam, women do not have it much better just different at least we do not have a machine that squeezes down there,, that would be indeed worse,,, well written with painful descriptions,,blessings..Cecil and Thank you for reading and commenting on my poems

Daver Austin August 14, 2008 at 3:58 AM Bravo! Yes, the old prostate problem done with great good humor. Tell ya what, Vince....if prostate doesn't get me, at 79 something else will. Glad you're clear. Vibrant good health to ya. Love, Daver

Heidie Buys August 12, 2008 at 4:51 PM Well at least you got a decent poem out of the ordeal, smile. A little bit of humor goes a long way. Love Heidie

Deneen White August 12, 2008 at 12:27 PM Hi Vince, what a great relfective way to put what you went through in the form of a poem, sorry my dear, see what we go through it's no laughing matter that much is true so the next time your woman gets upset because she needs an exam, say I understand dear and I feel for you m'am, LOL and thanks for the comment, great one Vince

Sharon Winter August 11, 2008 at 1:11 PM Hahaha! Vince, I needed this laugh. You are a total riot! Thank you my dear, and so sorry for your uncomfortable experience! ~lol~ Love, Shar

Carrie Richards August 11, 2008 at 1:06 PM This was soooo funny, I had to show it to my hubby!! He said "Now you know why I've been putting off my exam!!" (I've been nagging!!). It's the male version of what us girls go through...having our boobies squished and flattened like pancakes!!! This poem was a winner...keep us laughing!!

James Foulk August 11, 2008 at 11:55 AM Vince this really craked me up, forgive the pun. i had one of these they are called a proto, and the doctor told me i should have one every year, yah in his dreams, i screamed and yelled, and he said oh come now it's not that bad. this was a great piece. i will put this in my favorite poems, it is really funny one.

Valerie Bellefleur August 11, 2008 at 11:51 AM wonderfully written - we all have to have a sense of humour about some of the things in life we don't want to do - and you hit the nail on the head.

Laura Mckenzie August 11, 2008 at 11:46 AM Vince this made me laugh so hard the doctors are always poking at us aren't they. Womens check up aren't much better! :) Good one Laura

Michael Jordan August 11, 2008 at 10:50 AM Vince this poem was a crack up - what a outlook on a less than funny part of life - God Bless Vince and thanks for your comments and support