Pork Barrel Spendin'

Alas, I see the proposed federal budget has hit the press. I suppose its loaded with the usual absurd largesse! Gleeful solons elbowin' others at the trough gittin' their share, At the same time promisin' us the budget they will pare! Seems that legislators think that cash flow is never-endin', And just go on dreamin' up schemes for inane spendin'. It has been said that you can't fight Capitol Hill alone, So I'm joinin' in the fray, offerin' asinine proposals of my own! I want a study to see, that if all the sponges were taken from the seas, Would the water level rise or recede by some few degrees? Millions could be spent to study flies as they soar on the level, Then, how they suddenly land on the ceiling as quick as the devil! 'Twould be intriguin' to teach cassowaries and penguins how to fly. To fund this, money from medicare could be diverted on the sly! We need a million dollar pogo stick racin' track in my hometown. Never mind that it would have irate taxpayers jumpin' up and down! Now I don't mind payin' taxes and donatin' my fair share, But I do mind how my money is spent, I do loudly declare! Havin' proffered the above schemes, I may come to begrudge it. Some politicos may read this and include them in next year's budget! Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Rights Reserved)