Pilchard the Penguin Does Blue Planet

Penguin the pilchard leapt onto the ice He flipped and he flopped and arrived in a trice He took a deep breath and he held it and then He bellowed with all of his might… “MEN!” Pilchard the penguin said, “Where have you been?” And then asked his friend, “What on Earth have you seen?” Penguin the pilchard said, “I’m telling you, A big boat has come with a whole TV crew.” With all of the penguins now gathered around Pilchard’s mum, Herring, prepared Pilchard’s ground, “Remember the plan, we’ve done it before For when men with cameras visit our shore.” Pilchard the penguin said, “When they arrive, We show them the struggle we have to survive. Let’s huddle together then we can deliver The image they want so let’s practice our shiver.” A rumble, some heaving and ice cracks appeared And up popped an orca… who nobody feared “Okay,” he said, “so who do I chase, and who is the stand in, you know… just in case?” Pilchard the penguin said, “No ‘just in case’, Nobody’s getting consumed in this place It will be I that you shall assail And I won’t be eaten by no killer whale.” Seagull, the polar bear, said, “Holy cow… Does this mean I can let my wind go now?’ Pilchard the penguin said, “Don’t let it go, Until you’ve scraped ice up to make flakes of snow.” The film crew arrived and they took up positions They struggled to film the Antarctic conditions It came as a shock that the blizzards that blew Came with a stench that was rather like poo… The penguins all shivered while stood in one place While foul smelling snow pelted everyone’s face The crew filmed the penguin as orca gave chase And shed tears of joy when the whale lost the race Penguin the pilchard said, “Give them some smiles, And leap from the sea like Polaris missiles. And then do that thing that all humans find sweet Where young penguins stand on their mum’s and dad’s feet.” Pilchard the penguin said, “It’s for the tele, Won’t it look good if we slide on our belly. You see that ice gulley, why don’t we slide through it?” And Penguin the pilchard said, “That ought to do it.” The crew packed their gear and they made for the shore Where they boarded their boat and weren’t seen anymore While back with the penguins where men were now gone Pilchard the penguin said, “Get the fire on.”