Picture Perfect

this was his chance
a picnic to seduce her
in the meadow
   where the last girl was buried
   he spread out the red blanket...


4/21/13
for "the picture perfect" contest
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

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12
Ligon Avatar
October 22, 2013 at 6:48 PM
Full of suspense and horror in so few lines. Great job!
A  Avatar
August 22, 2013 at 9:05 PM
CONGRATULATIONS SUSAN,, Picture awesome Perfect. LOVE ~SKAT~
A   Avatar
August 22, 2013 at 8:03 PM
nice win... always..PD
Dietrich Avatar
August 22, 2013 at 3:07 PM
Susan, even without imagery being used very much , the "story" that this evokes leaves such an impression on the mind! For me, this is GREAT tanka. WEll, I don't know if I understand anything about tanka, but I sure love it. Congrats!!
Arowolo Avatar
August 22, 2013 at 2:51 PM
Wonderful piece...Congrats on your win...
Richards Avatar
August 22, 2013 at 2:48 PM
Reminds me of an old movie I just watched.......yikes !! Twilight Zone fodder !
Lamoureux Avatar
August 22, 2013 at 12:12 PM
This sent chills, congrats!
Pettit Avatar
June 11, 2013 at 11:53 PM
If Alfred Hitchcock were alive today, he would present a show based on this write. Congratulations, this is a good one.
May Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 9:51 PM
congrats on your win Susan
Richards Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM
It doesn't take many words to scare us.........terrific piece!!
A  Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 2:07 PM
congrats in Roy's contest............. SKAT
Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 1:24 PM
Short and scary , well done Susan congratulations love xx
Jerden Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 12:56 PM
Congratulations on the win. I'll be posting a blog with additional comments. Cheers, Roy
Dietrich Avatar
April 28, 2013 at 2:02 AM
soupmail. I need HELP
Collins Avatar
April 26, 2013 at 8:09 AM
Dear Susan - My favorite of the week. What a concept. Thanks for your comment and I am fine. I've got you in my favorites list, but have have been slow to pull it up. I don't see you at PFT anymore, but may not recognize you without "Black-Eyed" love you, kathy
Dietrich Avatar
April 24, 2013 at 1:48 AM
soupmail
A   Avatar
April 23, 2013 at 8:35 AM
Good morning Susan, hope you are well?? and drinking all the chicken soup... wink! anyways, I'm only stopping by cuz I haven't heard from you in such a long long time.... I'm wondering if you have forgotten me. well i better let you go, I'm leaving work early today. LOL, and thank you for the nice and lovely hi on my Facebook this morning... I'm still waiting for this to be my day. I mean that is what you said ...:-) wink! wink! luv~PD
Hunter Avatar
April 23, 2013 at 7:37 AM
Yikes! Love this, Susan!...have you been watching me picnic?....haha
Dietrich Avatar
April 22, 2013 at 6:03 PM
soupmail
Kendrick Avatar
April 22, 2013 at 4:29 PM
This is a scary one..Reads like a winner for the meadow contest..Thanks for stopping by..The Male Cardinal that I saw is brightly colored a deep red with the contrasting black..The Female is a very dull color more of a faded brown with just a touch of red with some black..Sara
Dietrich Avatar
April 22, 2013 at 2:46 PM
oh wow, FAVE!!!!!
De Burca Avatar
April 22, 2013 at 2:11 PM
Macabre, errie and wonderfully wicked. Such a simple scene yet twisted effortlessly almost Poe like.
Hicks Avatar
April 22, 2013 at 10:12 AM
Eek! Well this gave me chills! You mix such a happy image of a picnic with the horribleness of a dead body beneath... you know how to surprise the reader! Appeals to the Stephen King fan in me.
Poet Avatar
April 22, 2013 at 2:05 AM
Unique approach by you Susan.Enjoyed this tanka.
Cooper Avatar
April 21, 2013 at 6:40 PM
that's a scary thought... lol great thriller!
12
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