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Pas Muet

PAS MUET

I am a puppy here
The smallest
The skinniest
The silentest (is that even a word)
Stotteraar
Bègue

I wheel my wheels among them
The alpha dogs
The loud ones
I am silent
Bègue

My eyes are open wide
I watch them
Follow their every move
My mouth clammed shut
Bègue

My hands write nervously
On my notepad
With my pencil
My words arranged in neat sentences
Bègue

He understands though
He smiles with fun, no pity there
We go way back
He is my psychiatrist.
Bègue

In silence I contemplate
But silent I am not
My words are multi coloured
I like them
Niet stom
Not mute

Pas muet.
Pas muet.

***

December 30, 2016

Copyright © Darren White | Year Posted 2016

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Paul Dandrea Date: 5/21/2017 12:25:00 AM I like the whole thing but this stanza resonates with me: "He understands though He smiles with fun, no pity there We go way back He is my psychiatrist. Bègue" Pity is of no use whatsoever. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 5/21/2017 1:10:00 AM Pity is a hateful word. But it IS what I encounter. For the wheelchair, the stutter, the Tourette AND the fact that I need a psychiatrist. You are absolutely wonderful for finding and emphasizing just that one word....

Maureen McGreavy Pigeon Tart Date: 4/15/2017 9:46:00 PM This is fantastic Darren. I wish I had you on paper. Seven Piroet that dances in my heart, words...pieces of your heart topped with blond curly hair. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 4/16/2017 12:58:00 AM Hopefully one day I publish, ma mo :) And then you can have me on paper.

Space Cadet Date: 1/17/2017 11:38:00 AM O, I love this. What does the follow translate into: The Title, Bègue, Stotteraar,Not mute Pas muet. Pas muet. >÷÷ Login to Reply Darren White Date: 1/17/2017 12:25:00 PM Exactly, that's what I liked about precisely the words I chose to translate. Space Cadet Date: 1/17/2017 12:20:00 PM Thank you for the translation. It's lean and the words are thick. Darren White Date: 1/17/2017 11:47:00 AM Bègue (French) = stammerer; Stotteraar (Dutch)= stammerer; Pas muet (French) = Not mute; Niet stom (Dutch) = not mute... Glad you like it :)

Doug Vinson Date: 12/30/2016 9:29:00 PM : ) The smallest, skinniest puppy - great image. Darren, in 2007 I had (evidently) a bacterial infection in two vertebrae, which meant going to the hospital twice a day for ~3 hours each time, for intravenous infusions of antibiotics. Gad, what a pain. Yet in the end I treasure those memories - met a lot of fascinating people with cancer and immune system disorders, really nasty things. I am only slightly aware of how things are for you, but you never know.... Login to Reply Darren White Date: 12/31/2016 10:54:00 AM Yes, bacterial indeed or else no antibiotics :) Glad you recovered fully!. I haven't been able to speak at all for 5 full years and now I stutter badly. Yes, I've learned the art of observation, and anticipation, be fast, faster than every whim. Write fast, communicate with everything but spoken word.... Doug Vinson Date: 12/30/2016 9:54:00 PM The patience to observe (and endure) is a precious thing. Yeah, Darren - fully healed. Never knew exactly what it was, since nothing grew in the laboratory after a biopsy. Assumed to be bacteria since antibiotics seemed to work, i.e. if it was a virus then they wouldn't have been effective. Darren White Date: 12/30/2016 9:45:00 PM Ouch Doug! I know about that pain, more or less, not the same of course, but I face back surgery as soon as I am mentally and physically stronger. I will never walk again, but will hopefully be in less pain. Oh, where I am now are all sorts of fascinating people, but I am shy and have serious speech problems, but I observe, I am good at that :) Is your back fully healed by the way?

Chris Green Date: 12/30/2016 7:09:00 AM This is so cool Darren. I like how you did this and the message is heard. Just be you, don't allow anyone to silence you. Your poetry is always wanted and appreciated here. Keep it coming and use it to keep them guessing. :) Login to Reply Darren White Date: 12/30/2016 7:16:00 AM Thank you Chris, for saying all these nice things to me :) I am not silent. They didn't succeed to silence me, and if it's up to me they never will.

Jason Williams Date: 12/30/2016 5:34:00 AM I know it must be difficult or different rather being where you are now, instead of with the boys. But you'll get used to it with time. Cool mixing languages btw. ;-) Login to Reply Darren White Date: 12/30/2016 5:38:00 AM It is my first time in a wing for adults yeah. It's hard but I manage. Do some Japanese for me please :) <3

Claudia Polydoro Date: 12/30/2016 5:29:00 AM Ohhhh I like it..! how you used different languages! (thanks google translator for the help with them). And you do amazing things with your words, sweetie... Never be silent, because your words make the world a more beautiful place. <3 you Login to Reply Darren White Date: 12/30/2016 5:36:00 AM Haha yeah :) I'm not silent, just a bit intimidated here <3