Darleen Bilyeu Poet Prose Poetry

Pain

What's the point in doing this 
the pain will never go
wearing long pants and long sleeves 
so no one will ever know
under this ''happy'' mask I constantly wear
Im suffocating 
It's getting hard for me to bare
i wish i could tell everyone how i feel
instead i find different ways to deal
every night instead of crying myself to sleep
I stay awake to puke after I eat
suicide notes always scattered across the floor
but i never follow through
with a hope that chance will knock at the door
a chance at a good non-hurtful life
a chance to love myself and forget the knife.




-----------------------------------------to my homie hang in there!!!!-----------------------------

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Jade Exit April 28, 2009 at 11:48 AM wow good job you done great

Debbie Guzzi April 13, 2009 at 12:36 PM I have no idea wether this will comfort you but youth is a time of such frequent and radical change that many contemplate leaving life rather than dealing with it during this time. You are not alone. I feel at 60 one of the biggest reasons is fear, of the known & the unknown. Fear of doing without is a big one, travel to the third world help me get over this one. Many in countries who have little materially decide that family is all. Family is enough to live for, love. May you have Love.

Juan Onate April 9, 2009 at 4:03 PM i so love ur poems sis keep up the great writing and rock on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chris Yarnell April 1, 2009 at 1:33 PM i hope you get the chance for a non hurtful life lol nice work

Dver Ki March 21, 2009 at 12:36 AM Very sad but good written very expressive!

Catherine Adams March 6, 2009 at 3:13 PM Wow! Wonderful and truely deep! Thanks for the lovely comments! much love, Catherine:)

Sharon Winter February 22, 2009 at 7:00 AM A powerful write. Hope who ever this is for hangs onto hope, as life can change for the better in a moment as you so indicate towards the end. Pain is a factor for all of us. We all deal with it differently, but inside, the hurt remains the same. Excellent. Love, Shar

Carolyn Devonshire February 20, 2009 at 11:07 AM Darleen, Great work, especially the suffocation from the "mask I constantly wear." I hope, however, that you are doing better now. Thanks for reading "Hungry and Hopeless Americans." Such a tragedy! Love, Carolyn

Christina Vasquez February 13, 2009 at 11:01 AM this poem is jux feeled with emotions..........and i luv it!!!!!!!

Abe Lopez February 13, 2009 at 7:40 AM this poem is really well written and paints a sad picture. there is always hope to hang on to at the end of the day.....................nice

Elizabeth Neal February 11, 2009 at 4:16 AM The pain will go, you just have to be willing to let it go. I can relate to this poem. I too, felt this way and I agree,, throw the letters away and start over again. Don't give up hang in there and pray for God's help. Your poetry is a joy to read and I look forward to reading more. Welcome and thanks for sharing your thoughts. Love E.

Steve Edmonds February 10, 2009 at 9:50 PM Sad poem, we all have worn a mask a time or two but sometimes we just have to be ourselves. Clean that floor and throw those notes away. A little Poetry Soup will heal that broken heart. I welcome you and God bless....the Chief

Raul Moreno February 10, 2009 at 6:10 PM So sad to hear this story and I hope it's not how you are really feeling. If so, hang in there and stay positive. Things always work out in the long run. We don't have to seek a permanent solution for a temporary problem. I welcome you to POETRYSOUP where you are amongst great company and I invite you to read some of my work...Raul

Dver Ki February 9, 2009 at 1:02 PM Nice one too...:) kinda responds to my poem ;)