Ongepatshket Torqued Skewed Reflection

When e'er i chance to steel a passing glance in the mirror hairline fractures appear than 'afore long snap, crackle, pop becomes crystal clear, whence aluminium glass mirror (made of a float glass incorporating additional processes) leaves highly reflective surface patina 'ere one narcissist ken while away countless hours preening, primping, and pruning e'en the slightest glare ring blemish finds cause for cosmetic surgery evincing interlinear crows feet and dark circular "bags" that distinctly lear, which medical term for skin folds and ballottable skin edema described as “festoon,” or “malar mound,” an eye sore overclear demanding immediate dermatological action (if necessary) taking extra adipose tissue from rear end supposed extra junk in the trunk, where derrière, would not be unduly sore, perhaps requiring (whatever would suture self) plus extra padded underwear which subjugation voluntarily "going under the knife," would stave off depredations aging (such as puffy eyes) at least for another year.