One Sunless Day

sudden wailing storm
in the gutter a baby quail
lies dying. . . slowly

For Rick Parise's "Haiku You"

Copyright © | Year Posted 2010



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Date: 5/16/2015 12:17:00 PM
deep * Forever ~SKAT~
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Date: 1/4/2013 11:54:00 PM
awee... wish i could save the image...pd
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Date: 2/13/2011 6:33:00 AM
I think this one placed high recently in a haiku contest.It seems you forgot to click on the form.It is showing I DO NOT KNOW!---KASH
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Date: 6/7/2010 11:28:00 PM
is this contest over.lol, the rain..nice,,..p.s. i send you that report of mine. i have not gone over it all. You said I can send it to your e- mail. I did return as soon as you can. Yes and let me know if you got it first. I am so lazy to go over it it is a narrative. I think it is suppose to be separated by by eveyones stanza.. I will check by morning,..p.d.
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Date: 6/5/2010 1:52:00 AM
This is so sad Andrea. Thanks for your comment on Table Mountain as well as the guidance to personification. Still getting the hang of the forms etc.. Really appreciate it ~ WN
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Date: 6/3/2010 2:47:00 PM
"Fulfillment" is not for any contest... but I just had a thought so I wrote it down.. glad u liked it..luv..
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Date: 6/3/2010 1:23:00 PM
i do hope it will die peacefully. sounds like a quiet place at the end. maybe the quail has that, at least. ): -Always&Forever lynette
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Date: 6/2/2010 6:20:00 PM
I had to change the Rondel as I re read Jared's example poem and the lines repeat.. damn..so now I don't think it makes any sense and lost the flow the Moulin Rouge Deja Vu but lots of poets seem to like it a lot... just to know when u go to write yours... look at his example carefully..luv..
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Date: 6/2/2010 2:43:00 PM
Poor baby quail!This is heartbreaking.your writimg always leave impact,dear Andrea!Celene!
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Date: 6/2/2010 2:40:00 PM
Sounds sorta like today and yesterday...Keep the creative and descriptive pen flowing..Sara
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Date: 6/2/2010 2:23:00 PM
hi Andrea--was about to log out when I saw your comment--haha I seem to be always sucked right back in to the Soup! crazy me...thanks for your comments on my poem about the storm--and sorry, that was written 2 years ago--my muse hasn't gotten back in touch with me--haha maybe I'll meet her in my dreams--sorry really have to go now--checked out the blog too--no replies though...but thanks again! hugs! bye for now!!
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Date: 6/2/2010 1:53:00 PM
Dear Andrea: Fantastic, yet sad poem. Great job. Thanks 4 reading and commenting on my poem. It was fantastic in Paris and the art work was amazing. Peace: Sheol
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Date: 6/2/2010 11:22:00 AM
ahhhh....how heart wrenchingly sad.... slowly my frown lines turn. Good luck in the contest! Love, Susan
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Date: 6/2/2010 6:37:00 AM
Hi .. I wrote it last night but could not focus to post it and I made some revisions just now and added a verse so hope Deb likes it.. and yes ..they did it one year in Wildwood as a fund raiser ..last year they had the bikini on a lady lifeguard ... and she brought in so much money for the beach patrol... it was great..only her suit was not red but yellow last year with a big face of the Sun on her rear and bursts on the top..so cute and it made me want to get into mine this year ..and I did..
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Date: 6/2/2010 6:00:00 AM
Hi Andrea! So sad your Haiku-of course must have been a sunless day when that happened! Thank you for your kind comments and best of luck in the contest!!!Love, Gert
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Date: 6/2/2010 5:42:00 AM
Good luck Andrea with this "beauty" of an entry.. luv that title ..so interesting... compliments your Haiku so well... another great write from u and thankxxx for the comments on my Italian Sonnet.. now off to Deb's contest... have a great day..luv.. Linda-Marie
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Date: 6/2/2010 1:43:00 AM
So sad, but nature has its own way of thinning out its own, of course in a storm no one would be able to hear the cries to know the quail needs help.... An intense and thought provoking picture painted for so few words Andrea, well done! Thanks for your ever welcome comments, always good to see your name... Kindest thoughts, Anna-Marie.
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Date: 6/1/2010 9:33:00 PM
I call this - death and evolution in nature.
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Date: 6/1/2010 9:32:00 PM
A nice entry. Good luck in the contest, Andrea.
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Date: 6/1/2010 7:59:00 PM
just read your comments--:((, now I feel worse, thank you, lol ;) I don't know why knowing that bird really died that way really affected me :(( ok, maybe because to know it died in such a defenseless manner is just so tragic (just like so many things in life I guess...) eep now I have to scour the Soup for happier writes!! heehee & I'm glad you enjoyed my parody :)--but my muse has left me again... don't hit that screen too hard, now ;)
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Date: 6/1/2010 7:49:00 PM
Hi Andrea! I really felt sad when I read your last line--:(( --and I read this too when it's just finished raining so hard outside (& yup birds were a-twittering too!)...hope nobody met that fate--just the mention of the word "baby" and "dying" just breaks my heart--yup haha I can be such a softie sometimes ;)
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