Old Age Is When

OLD AGE IS WHEN: 1) Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face. 2) Getting a little action means you don't need fiber today. 3) Getting lucky means you remember where you left your car in the parking lot. 4) An all nighter means not having to get out of bed in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. 5) You don't care where your spouse goes as long as you don't have to go too. PONDERINGS 1) I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I realized that most people die from natural causes. 2) The easiest way to find something around the house is to replace it. 3) Never take ife too seriously. No body gets out alive anyway. 4) In the '60's folks took acid to make the world weird, now the world is weird and folks take prozac to make it normal. 5) Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,"I think I'll squeeze those dangley things and drink whatever comes out." 6) Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there. I'm going to eat the next thing that comes out of it's butt."