Numb as we can be

Numb.... Lonely Staring at the same gloomy rain dripping down 2 different window panes over 300 miles away Feeling alone & ashamed, full of regret because of how we hehaved but not giving up bc this Actual, Magical, One of a kind love is just too unfathomable to not crave its right there out of our reach, our plans, wants & goals so easy to speak but walls of fear deadlock life's gears, and we rolled backwards without even realizing we were so far gone, my dear we did this together but you gotta honestly tell me if climbing back up w. me by your side is going to be too heavy I can only love you if you let me I need you just as much, You're the only one that gets me and accepts me, and my damaged beyond repair, crazy drug addicted brain we drive eachother insane but it could be so much different we can be happier than ever its an uncontrollable animal instinct I wish that whenever you got mad you'd just shut up & kiss me before the bullet filled words rip through my heart & every single one hits me like im marked with a bulls eye all we need is stability, but the chaos continuously emerges instantly