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Not My Home

I was never afraid to wake up My life isn't a reality - It is a vision casting stones In an unfeeling river of doubt Where are the spirits that understand? How much more can I fill this mind With unanswered questions? I am destitute, naked and empty Yet filled to the limit So many holes yet to fill - So many useless stones to cast Is it fear that holds me In these dirty depths? Is it pride? Some escaped soot of ego? I need fresh air to breathe A fresh perspective - A cool conscience My senses writhe in this place How befuddled and lost I have become I absorb all the dread in my heart It feels like I live in it now But it is not my home I repeat - It is not my home September 13, 2017

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Christopher Flaherty

Date: 10/7/2017 7:05:00 PM

Love this Laura It's not Home. Until you belong

Justin Bordner

Date: 9/14/2017 7:05:00 PM

Continuued...Sometimes I think it's a marvel that it has withstood all the nonsense, the storms, the rust and wear, so many broken and wornout things to it, yet here it stands magnificent and mine, and I pay property taxes everyday to nature and God...J.A.B

Laura Breidenthal
Date: 9/19/2017 10:49:00 PM

Your wisdom always floors me, Justin. Thanks for always sharing your beautiful heart with me and the world. You're an especially dedicated and loving poet.<3~Laura

Justin Bordner

Date: 9/14/2017 7:02:00 PM

This shamelessly morose poem makes me think about how our hearts are the only true and constant homes that we have throughout our lifetimes Laura.The heart home can become so many good or bad things, it can be refurnished, renovated, dilapidated,full of poor light, awful views, dust and stink,or cozy,aromatic,safe and stimulating.The state of my heart home has been in many, many conditions since childhood...J.A.B.

Sunlite Wanter

Date: 9/14/2017 7:01:00 PM

Just speculating, but sounds like you have an inquiring mind if this is not fictional. Anyway, its a beautifully written expression.

Laura Breidenthal
Date: 9/19/2017 10:45:00 PM

Thank you, for reading and leaving such a sweet comment. This is indeed a very personal poem! <3~Laura