Nonsense
If a moment passed
Where I didn’t feel
Do, or see anything
In which I didn’t
Have to be anyone
Hear anyone
See anyone
Speak to anyone
A moment where
I could cease to be
Human
In which meaning and time
Would coincide
Instead of always collide
And where the measure
Of a man
Was not established
By what he did
Or did not do
With his words
Or his hands
A moment of pause
To reflect, collect,
And refocus my thoughts
So the fog
That clouds my eyes
Would dissipate
Knowing they are not
It’s destined place
A moment of pleasure
A breath of peace, joy,
Relief, and laughter
I’ve forgotten what it is
To not care
About anything
In particular
At all
To relinquish
Myself to the present
A moment of closure
Where I am alone
But I am not
Alone
A security blanket
That feels warm
Instead of
That itchy, uncomfortable thing
Aunt Carol used to
Wrap around you
And after which
You never mentioned
You’re cold around her again
But you still
Accept invitations to her home
Every time she asks
A moment of reprieve
From the chaos
The overanalyzing,
Overthinking, overcompensating
Out of the extenuating circumstances
Your life uses
To call unwanted attention
To itself
An intermission from
The emotional abuse
Inflicted by you
on yourself
The loathing, the hatred
The outpouring of negative
Processes on repeat
In your head
A respite from all
Of its nonsense
If I could have a moment
Where all of it
Would stop
For just a minute
I’m fairly certain
I’d find a way
To be okay
Again.
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