Night Thoughts Run Wild

The night is the most lonely time of my life where I sit and be alone with my thoughts. My perception of what I thought my life was gonna be like is now so dull and dysfunctional.I cant believe after all these years, I can no longer be happy unless I separate myself from the leech whose been hunting my life from with in. but I found happiness today i found it in a person I never met .A person whom looks like they got it all figured out.A person with a plan ,goal. A person who seeks the forbidden especially how it is now ,and days. The forbidden fruit of love. oh how it feels how it tingles inside. The same love that can also hurt a person like me. I start to question myself is this what I want ,and need in my life. but life is about taking risk making and mending hearts unpromised. Who am I to judge those having the willingness to find other wise, so I say to myself why not take a risk. All or nothing let God lead me on this path and question.I start to wonder why. I ask myself is this really a person sent by you or is it just a profound part of my imangition, a fantasy.I cant believe is he really giving a person like me whose not worthy at a chance at love , life and ecstasy. I sit back rocking myself on my chair in deep thought and smile could this be real.