New Dating Site
New Dating Site
Sign up today with grunt or groan or moans
Our specimens are dateable or so we say
Sign up to Date-It-Mate-It web-site right away
Without delay, today, or die
True love is hard to find so make it easy
Variety is the spice of life so try a different species
We do not discriminate. It’s party time
Animal, vegetable, minerals and clowns of every kind
We will set you up with anything that we can find
Don’t look under rocks to find a mate
We’ve taken the liberty for your convenience and your sake
To secure your bug like buddies and snakes for future dates
Kept In a jar, a box and under glass
We have men and women refrigerated
Some even come alive but only at a princely price
Frogs are perfect for one night
Marriages are performed at Date-It-Mate-It
With whips and chains, we have no shame
We'll hook you up with I-Pads with your name
Nothing is left to chance
Nothing goes to waste for your romance
Bricks and stones are half price at our site
Sex with them is fine and we sell blinders
Critters are for free and come with leashes
Date it-Mate it-web site does it right
We make all couples fit
By using crow bars and pliers
And if it doesn’t work
We will kill it, to eat it, or wear it home
Use credit cards for your convenience
But we don't take them all the time
Due to local ordinances and obvious crimes
Signing up is easy as can be
“X” marks the spot
Simply state your species
And preferences between the sheets
Date-it-Mate-It loves to please
Sign up today
You will never leave
Copyright © Earl Schumacker | Year Posted 2015
Post Comments
Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.
Please
Login
to post a comment