Christine Phillips | + Follow Poet |
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My Three Prayers

Here I am sitting in the chair
Staring at the ceiling above my head
Contemplating life's meaning  and testing my deep feelings
If a pin drops I can hear the sound
If a dog  moans I can understand its groans
If  a crow screams I can feel  its extreme
Today is a brand new day
and  the devil has receive his marching order to leave town
But his combolos are still hanging around
Yesterday was a very perplexing  day
The weather was strange my feeling
was weird and it appeared as if all the dead had risen
and was marching around the State of  Virginia
I have never felt anything like this before
Birds flying from door to door 
and the force was stronger than before
A peculiar feeling saturated the atmosphere
And heaven and earth  were locked in a passionate  dialogue
I got up early and went in the street  to pray
I circled around the neighborhood with my cup
and a tiny flash light and scripture verses flowing through my mind
I walked  and prayed in an unknown tongue
and  suddenly a  perplexing feeling  start bubbling up in my gut
I have never had this sensation before it was intangible 
It wasn't pain , anxiety stress or  tension it felt as if
something was  moving inside me trying desperately to burst out
And there was no way for it to  get out
I  knelt down and water the street with my tears 
as the cars  drive up and down the way 
trying desperately  to hear what I say
But I prayed in an unknown language that only God understands
And he appointed the angels to take me by my hand
I tried to forced this unnatural feeling  out of my belly
But it wrestled with me and took me to another spot and place me on my knees.
I prayed  and tried to usher the terrible feelings away
But the tears  kept flowing and the sensation kept growing
I wander up the  dark road with the Holy Spirit guiding me
Again I stumbled upon another spot and bowed down and pray
I felt the tension fading away but something profound was pulling it back
As soon as I got home the rain starts pouring down
And this terrible  consciousness was still lingering around 
It made me feel uncomfortable
My spirit got cross and I felt something oppressive around me
I could not identify it and I could not get rid of it
As the  rain pours my heart groans
and I could not held back the tears 
The sensation returned and positioned itself in my gut
I felt as if  someone was literally  beating me up
I felt  used, abused and  mistreated and  I could not discard the tears
I had no cure for this sudden fits I had to vent and let it all out
so I  positioned a pillow over my mouth 
and held my belly and cry out loud
I screamed deeply inside the pillow suffocating the sound 
so that it could not spread around
The wound was so deep I could hardly hear my heart beat
When the feeling  faded I walked  outside in the rain
and  got something sweet to appease my heart beat
It felt as if it was judgment day 
because nothing was going my way
Even  when everything is tumbling around me
 my inner feeling usually keeps me intact
I could not shake the feeling away
It cuts deep inside, rubbing on my galls and marrow
stirring up my intestine
sending  shock  waves through my body
and sapping every bit of my energy
I know that God had his hands in this
Only he alone knew what was happening and could fix it
I stopped by the Giant supermarket and bought a dozen doughnuts
On the cover of the container  a big  number three  sticker stared at me
I contemplate what God was trying to say to me
I walked back in the  cold and muggy weather
something was happening inside and God was on my side
I sat on the chair for hours with this feeling rumbling in my belly
I tried desperately for it to go away
but it kept nibbling at  my punitive heart
Night had fallen the tears suddenly stop flowing
and I felt my blood circulating in a cordial way
The rain subsides and something magical stood by my side
Forcing the  oppressive spirit  to run away 
The devil was finally defeated my gut was cleared 
and the dark clouds have finally disappeared 
My three prayers were answered.

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