Lesa Rodden Poet Rhyme

My Story

Look here in my mind - there is a story to tell
It wont make much sense - but I’ll try to explain well

There’s a past that is hidden - far far below
Void of any thoughts or feelings - and no light does it show

It starts out quite dreary - in the first several years
When I tried to remember - there came only tears

Little bits and pieces - of memories all plain
Just seconds of time playing - each one scattered with pain

They might not be real - a mere picture in your mind
But why does it keep playing - too many times.

They don’t have much meaning - but come with much shame
Which doesn’t make sense - at this point in the game

I was too young to know - whats right or whats wrong
So why am I plagued - with this debilitating song

It hurts just a little - it hurts all the time
I have to pretend - i knew all my lines

My story is crazy - so many others are not
I wish I knew what was what - and why I got dealt what I got

For years I felt guilty - like it was my fault all this shame
But come to find out - to others, twas just a stupid game.

So the joke is on me - how funny is that?
When I was growing up - I should’ve been such a brat

They played me so foolish - is how I feel now
But they are the foolish ones - because I made it somehow

With all the misfortune - and abandon and lack
And no hint of normal - no one had my back

I missed out on middle age - due to numbing and a daze
Only to come to my senses - with years added to my age

Here I am in my fifties - I now realize quite a bit
It cost a lifetime  oh well - I know now this is it.

I know who I am now - I know what they did
I know what those pictures are - and I know what they hid

I don’t have to see - all those memories now
I’ve dealt with them my own way - the ones I need to anyhow.

My story is told - a portion anyway
If you want to know more - come see me some day

2016

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Darren White May 15, 2017 at 12:32 AM I have been reading a few of your poems here. You don't have an easy life. So many of us here are struggling. It is good we all have our poetry! It enables us to write about it. It doesn't change ourlives, but we can share some of it. Keep writing, and welcome to PoetrySoup :) Lesa Rodden May 30, 2017 at 1:02 AM Thank you, Darren. Last year, all these poems came into my mind. It's been a real healing experience to let it all out. I am thankful to have Poetry Soup as my vehicle to do so. I appreciate your kind words. Lesa Rodden