Tim Smith Poet Limerick

My Old Bag - Dark Humour

I lay my dearest Susan down to rest
Of tall tales and humour she was the best
An excuse each night
Wouldn't hold me tight
There's something I need to get off my chest

See, Susan was a talented old hag
Three men at once she quite often would shag
The gents often told
Of her lips of gold
and the tricks hidden deep inside her bag

I put up with her, turned the other cheek
She was built of strength, I a man so weak
Shame filtered these eyes
She laughed at my cries
Til they found her in the bag by the creek


*no bags were hurt in the making of this poem*

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Edward Mccall February 7, 2017 at 9:35 AM I once new a sue who showed me things that I did not know, she disappeared to where I knew not, but now I know to where sue got.// what a fun yet dark limerick You shared Tim it gave me a laugh this morning. Thanx.

Charlie Smith January 31, 2017 at 11:54 AM Hate to hear of the demise of such promising talent, alas I suppose she got what was coming to her... so to speak. Good one Tim.

Carolyn Devonshire January 31, 2017 at 8:55 AM LOL Some fun humor here, Tim. I'm guessing you put Susan in the bag by the creek after she laughed at your crying. Thanks for giving me some laughs this morning! Hugs, Carolyn

Arthur Vaso January 30, 2017 at 10:09 PM Oh my if it was me, I would Sue!!! Lim'Rik Flats January 31, 2017 at 1:40 PM :-)

Lim'Rik Flats January 30, 2017 at 9:29 PM I do not know if it's true//(What you say about Sue)//but those who partook//are probably shook//(of course, they're also missing a screw) John Lawless January 31, 2017 at 9:54 AM Love the twisted play on words at the end.... Tim Smith January 30, 2017 at 9:36 PM awesome my friend

Lim'Rik Flats January 30, 2017 at 9:25 PM At the bottom of the creek laid Sue//but give the old hag her due//she made 'em smile//for quite awhile//I'm told, don't know if it's true. Tim Smith January 30, 2017 at 9:35 PM haha

Daniel Turner January 30, 2017 at 3:00 PM I once took Susan for a spin, she told me you were a has been, no satisfaction, and no attraction, that you belonged in a loony bin. Tim Smith January 30, 2017 at 3:02 PM lol...good one DT

Darren White January 30, 2017 at 2:51 PM Oww Tim, dark but so funny! Good to know no bags were hurt... Tim Smith January 30, 2017 at 2:57 PM lol...not a one

Jan Allison January 30, 2017 at 2:26 PM ha ha ha I guess she was weighed down with lies Tim - dark but humourous my friend lol:-(I wonder if she ever met Peter from my latest poem lol!!:-) hugs Jan xx Tim Smith January 30, 2017 at 2:32 PM I heard she's met many Peters

Chris Green January 30, 2017 at 2:23 PM This was dark Tim and I love the note at the bottom, that was really funny. Tim Smith January 30, 2017 at 2:26 PM Yes it took off in an unplanned direction. Maybe I shouldn't of used my ex's name.