My Misguided Thoughts

I sit here wondering, concentrating, trying to take it all in. What happened to the life I use to live? I'm stuck, torn, confused, empty inside, lost without trace of insanity to grab. Time seems to just stand still, but slowly fade away. Pain, grief, anger, sorrow where do I begin. Maybe if I ran and hid my tears would do the same. So much I have to say, but the words drift as silent echos in the window. Who am I, what am I doing in this hell-foresakend body? This bitter world is never sweet, trying to manage standing on your own two feet. If you should fall and get a bruise or two, remember these are often made from matters of the heart, which is harder to consume. Yes, you played a part, that was not the issue I hated the crying games. You thought you'd fool my heart, when we danced you gladly sang the songs. I tried closing my eyes, tightly plugging my ears, then the music stops, silence is all that's left. Please don't whisper or hold my hand, don't run your fingers through my hair just be thoughtful, turn and quickly walk away. Don't look back it's now the past, do me a favor throw those memories away, make sure when you open the door to leave, you remember to close it too. I'll stand alone till your finally gone, sketch out a plan on living on my own, the days and nights come and go, just like the memories before will all disappear. I've felt enough, seen it all don't be surprised if you never receive a call. Fairytales, romances, are nothing as they seemed, happily ever after only exist in dreams. You say wishes are suppose to come true, I think mine got lost a time or two, life is not easy don't give up. You'll start to reminisce as the tears will manage to fall, struggling to deal with it all alone. Letters of their lost words you'll get in the mail saying, "I loved you, always will" be strong as you read them all, when your finally done tear them up, burn them up if you'd like. Send a letter in reply, explaining to them to simply and kindly, "Go to Hell," no longer will you have control of my misguided thoughts.