My Mind Is a Maze

Can you feel this heat? I'm smoldering beneath the ashes.. I feel so naked,still. Cradling the misgiving and mistakes, I fear this is the cycle of insanity. Free the chains and lift me from this water, so suffocating and debasing. I want purged of my past, it is festering within me. My body is a cell, my mind is the prisoner. If I cared less, felt less, would I be less broken in the end? Every calculated move,and yet I still don't add up in my mind. Oh, these insecurities could eat me alive. Instead, they rip and tear at my peace of mind, leaving me with only a frayed thread to dangle from. How I unravel so perfectly and haphazardly. I fear my need might just burn us down. yet I feed the fire, I poke and I prod. I push and I doubt. I struggle to ignore this incessant clawing at my skin as I wait for sleep to come. Can you lay here now with me and will me back to dreams? Enveloped in your arms I feel safe, your heartbeat is my lullaby.