My Fifty Years In a Nut Shell

I was born fifty years ago on April 10th 1964 Looking back through the years I began to explore My mama said when it was time for me to be born I decided to come early and fast in the wee morn Born five week premature with jaundice I had to stay High fevers, convulsions and even a coma would come my way But by the grace of God I made it through each and every one I could have died before my life really started or even begun. And through my fifty years God has shown me grace and mercy As I look back I’m so glad he loved me and thought of me worthy I remember my first home in Hayward on Burr way Memories are a little foggy but my sense of home will stay Moved to Dixon when I was just four years old To a big beautiful house where my life started to unfold This would be the place I would meet my life long best friend She was playing in our backyard the first day we moved in. So many memories in this house in Dixon on Marvin way A Baby deer named Bambi and our first dog named Maggie mae My life sized doll house my parents gave me as a birthday surprise I would spend hours in there with my plastic appliances making mud pies Life was blissful and I had not a care in the world I was living Until the day my parents sat us down and said they were splitting I just remember crying and in total shock this was happening My parents would no longer be together my whole life unraveling We ended up moving to a two story house with mice and peeling paint Mom worked long hours to feed us four kids who showed no restraint My mom struggled to balance work and being home with us four Soon my brothers moved to dads who’s idea was it I’m not sure My dad died August 19th 1979 at the age of forty from a massive heart attack I didn’t know then how this would change my life but now can see its full impact My teen years were cut short because I decided to become a mom How scared I was to have to drop “mom, I’m pregnant” bomb Have you ever heard of the song “Going to the chapel of love?” Married now at seventeen feeling all grown up; well sort of. On January 2nd 1982 my daughter Melinda was born fuzzy & screaming Didn’t know what I was really get into, I must have been dreaming She was the first baby born of the year and was the winner of two contests So many prizes couldn’t collect them all but we sure tried to do our best Isn’t it funny how you imagine how it would all work out in your young mind? But then reality sneaks up on you and smacks you hard on your behind. Now a single mother at the age of nineteen and moved back in with my mom And throughout my life I will make poor decisions but no need to write every wrong Pregnant at twenty with my son Joshua and Melinda now two almost three I didn’t know what I was going to do but knew they deserved better than me This you see will be the hardest thing I would ever have to do in my life I chose to give Josh new parents whom I lived with until I said goodbye I was blessed to have pictures and letters sent through his growing up years I remember the first letter I received from Josh I was so nervous eyes filled with tears My son Brandon was born on my mom’s birthday he was my biggest and my last He was my little dare devil and escape artist who was always trying to get past He would like to climb out of his crib and sneak out the front door for a stroll I chained and locked the door and even barred the windows thinking I was in control Till one day two police officers were at my door wanting to see him and talk to me, I guess They said a neighbor called out of concern and then the police threaten me with CPS. I have been married more than my fair share to tell the truth and it’s hard to admit I have walked down the aisle six times and finally found the one to whom I commit TJ is my husband who I met six years ago and have been married to him for three Unable to have children of his own he now is known fondly as Dad, Padre and Papa T My grandchildren make me smile just thinking of them and oh how I miss their precious faces I have eight all together and love each and every one so much my heart had to grow extra spaces As I look through my mind’s eye and examine my past adventures, blessings and sorrows I have come to realize to cherish each and every moment because no time can be borrowed My fifty ….. In a nut shell.