My Christmas Roast

There was Turkey and sausage meat, gammon ham too,
Four pigs in blankets for me, you and you
I did Yorkshire puddings and parsnips well glazed
Sprouts, roast potatoes: I’m thus far unfazed…

But then there was broccoli, cauli and peas
I said to the carrots, “There’s no room for these.”
I plonked them on top… with no room for finesse 
The cranberry stuffing did not look impressed

It got relegated onto a side plate
With Yorkshire puds that I’d had to relocate
The gravy went onto the main plate with care
It took quite some skill to keep it on there

Of course I got jibes about plates that don’t fit
“Are we to eat it… or climb over it?”
But all of the leftovers didn’t amount
To something that next year would cause a re-count

Strangely, the Christmas pud wasn’t required
An afternoon walk, it seemed, wasn’t desired
Everyone slumped into armchairs and couches
The custard remained in its unopened pouches

But sometimes a simple man must be ‘that guy’
When dishes and saucepans are piled up high
So, with people dozing I just had to think
“Somebody here has to empty the sink.”

So, rinsing and stacking and running the ‘Hot’
I gave the washing up liquid a shot
I’m washing up after the meal of my life
When suddenly there with a towel… is my wife

She said, “That was perfect, it tasted so good,
You cooked Christmas dinner just as I once could.”
And soon I too dozed in the chair that’s my place
It’s likely that I had a smile on my face
Copyright © | Year Posted 2023

Poem

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Fisher Avatar
December 26, 2023 at 5:05 PM
What a perfect picture of piled potato and pudding plating you've painted here. So well rhymed with a cool story to boot!
Flood Avatar
December 27, 2023 at 2:29 PM
Those plates sure were well stacked… we actually wondered whether the five thousand might tap the door! Thanks, David
Bauer Avatar
December 26, 2023 at 9:49 AM
sounds like you deserve a round of applause, terry, for putting together such an amazing feast for your family. glad everyone enjoyed and now you can relax and enjoy the leftovers. i very much enjoyed your poem...
Flood Avatar
December 26, 2023 at 4:35 PM
Thanks, Ilene. I must be learning from you… I never thought I’d write about cooking dinner ;-) Hope you had a great Christmas Day. Terry
Cunningham Avatar
December 25, 2023 at 11:33 PM
I raise my glass to you Terry, sounds like you cooked a meal fit for for a king. I hope the family let you have today off because you've earned it. Tom
Cunningham Avatar
December 26, 2023 at 2:41 AM
Lol, I didnt spot it, still in a daze from over indulgence. I'd always soupmail if I spot a typo. No need for the world to know. Same here today, cold meats, chips etc. Not to mention about 10 varieties of cheese. Son in law works for a cheese company. Enjoy the continuing celebrations.
Flood Avatar
December 26, 2023 at 1:56 AM
Cold meat and bakies today, so that’s simple enough. Thanks for not spotting (or announcing to the world) my use of ‘their’ in place of ‘there’…. Oops! I just did. I’ve put it right now…. Perhaps nobody noticed. Here’s to a great new year for you and yours. Terry
Wolf Avatar
December 25, 2023 at 5:53 PM
So sweet, Terry. YOU ARE DA MAN! ~ Gershon
Flood Avatar
December 25, 2023 at 6:03 PM
Thanks GW. Every word the truth. All the best of the season to you. Terry,
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