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Muthoni - From Kenya

We used to wait outside 
at the girls rooming house
by the Ohio in Cincinnati

Sex does not self heal
Nor does the salamander  
we trapped under the moss

We always said
We'd die together
At daybreak
We knew better

Love does not always
fill the heart
On rainy nights
It kills the heart

The noon at the clinic
shall remain our secret
The long recovery
Bittersweet

We woke this morning
To our failed romance
Your boyfriend from Somalia
He was right

Some women are exotic
Like goldfish
only less slippery
Always out of reach

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Michael Vacek

Date: 8/1/2017 3:43:00 PM

Your 3rd and 7th stanza could almost stand alone. They were the parts that made me think and hit me on the heart level. I have found that writing in the 3rd person (without I, me, my or us, we, our) opens the poem up to the reader, allowing the reader to insert themselves. I will use the plural first person if I am making reference to the collective all (everyone) Keep up the good work!

Darren White

Date: 7/5/2017 3:33:00 AM

This is Free Verse. And it is simply beautiful, you can write. Your last stanza is a real gem... Welcome to PoetrySoup :P)

M Braimah Saaka
Date: 7/5/2017 10:18:00 AM

Thanks!