Motherhood

expectations blurred the page
of motherhood.  I thought it through,
each point of view. My plans were laid

a shade of pink, a hue so new
would come upon the heels of two
who sketched my world with shades of blue

I'd framed her world for my display
a trophy of my fantasy

chiseled clear, I saw it all, 
beyond the stage of snakes and snails
growing boys, trucks and toys
tossed across my pregnant form
doing mindless daily chores, I crafted dreams
rehearsed the themes, disarming tales of nursery rhymes
I'd plan her life to suit my theme

but, who was I to redesign
a perfect child, I thought I owned?
sowing selfish schemes, she'd be
cloned to be a form of me -  I'd live my dream
through her, all mine, to hone, redo
a mother's fragile paper doll

I did lose sight of destiny
compared, alike, - we shared a trace
resemblance of hair and face
presumptions swept between the lines
she was not meant to be defined

this child of God withheld her dreams

of ways to make the stars align
this aquamarine was never mine
what stirred her heart -  vast worlds apart
she felt the sun within her soul
and thus, I've learned
I must let go
she must be free, not who I own

I've closed a chapter to that book
one looks in awe, as she became 
a person who can touch the soul
beyond my dreams, she brings to all
a million lights, they've never seen before

emerging stars are bright with gold
hers comes alive.  old dreams are cold
no two alike, as it should be
each one a star with different poles

I've owned the fear of letting go

____________________________________________________

4/20/16 
Contest: OWN IT!
Sponsor: Cyndi McMillan
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

Poem

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Macmillan Avatar
May 10, 2017 at 6:45 PM
Carrie, I apologize for this late contest closure, and I appreciate you not withdrawing your entry. This piece is gorgeous, lots of soulful imagery and that emotive quality that haunts. Congratulations on your win and I appreciate your patience. Thank you for bringing your art to Soup.
Chappell Avatar
April 22, 2016 at 3:44 PM
Beautiful passion of an angel much love alway xx
Scars Avatar
April 20, 2016 at 8:15 PM
Just beautiful Carrie...Be blessed :)-luloo
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