More For Me

I sold the oven and bought a microwave I can't even make a pot roast (You took the cookbook with you) It's like my torture chamber for refrigerated food Zapping all the nutrition like a superpower I make that nerdy reference cause you're not around The audience in my head is the only sound So you can keep your Ronald McDonald hair due I'll keep my pride and my wallet You can keep your "garden trimmings" I pretend to like And I'll live off Hot Pockets When you leave through that door Don't forget the makeup that makes you pretty I'm making popcorn for a grand total of one Cause there's more for me I'm kicking my feet up on the table, Do you like the rings? (I fed your handmade coasters to the dog) I'm taking it easy like a log on a lake Letting the leaves pile up cause I don't have to rake Through out the whole day I'm flipping through the channels Shirtless... I don't have to wear this ugly flannel Baby, you can just walk on by I'll even wave you a goodbye (Can't mouth the words with Bud Light don't my throat) I'm redecorating the house Burnt the traps and claimed a pet mouse (Made a bed for him from my "favorite" coat) And without you around I can be more frivolous with my money I'm ordering take out with a side of fried rice Cause there's more for me