Mixed Emotions

Leaving family home, grief, a loved one lost Reasons differ as life deals its cards, Accept and hold close to your heart Never show a single card, decisions await. Leave your home for greener pastures Some gates are locked warning trespassers, Mothers and Fathers pass on so quickly On your own, life can be prickly. Memories abound in strange ways A word or an action comes your way. Walk the road of so many dreams Lack of people and houses unseen. Demolished, making way for progress Stop and stare, family home, greets me. Still standing proud, defying inevitable I Stand so still for hour after hour. Each moment in my life has passed so quickly, A visit is called for, showing bravery. Find myself standing at the front door Off its hinges, looking forlorn. I pick it up as if helping an old friend Place against a wall, deserves a rest. Step inside, met by familiar settings, Desertion has taken its toll of surroundings. Silence, so silent, a noise it makes, Walk the rooms, still looking proud. Inner voice has taken control Leave right now and save your soul Ignore the message, do not understand. My parents’ bedroom is where I now stand To this day when I am judged I swear I smelled the perfume, of a Woman I called Mam Left the home with one look back. Then returned to life, get back on track. As said before, words and actions, inspire dreams Sometimes a nightmare or so it seems, Believe what we want, or dream.