Merry Christmas Everyone- the Night Before

T’was the night before Christmas And in his outhouse Sat Ja quietly listening To waltz’s, by Strauss. (Really, he was leafing thru Penthouse) His shitter was fitted With all manner of lights That couldn’t be missed No matter what heights When up on the roof There arose such a clatter Ja, kicked open the door To see, what was the matter So there sat Ja With his pants pulled down His ass in a hole On his forehead, a frown He leaped up so quickly Through the doorway to pass Tripped over his pants And fell on his ass Then flat on his back His bare ass in the snow He looked up to see The roof all aglow Poor Santa had landed On that, small, sloped roof But there wasn’t enough room For sleigh, and each tiny hoof Ja had decorated everything So the outhouse, shone bright And Santa mistook it When he arrived that night The reindeer slid off Were hanging by their straps And Santa had saved them By grabbing, the roof flaps Poor Rudolph fell the farthest Boy, was his nose beaming Just then, losing his grip Santa started screaming Fly Dancer, fly Vixen Fly Donner, fly Blitzen Don’t let me fall into This ****, Ja was fixin Then just like magic They started to float And Santa, raising his fist Did this warning shout Be very careful old man I’ll get you some day Stay alert Christmas Eve Don’t get in my way Now, each Christmas Eve Ja, won’t step foot out that door Cause he knows Santa is waiting To even the score BOEMS by JA 18