mika truse Poet Free verse

masks

A hundred masks which one to use?
A hundred dreams which one to lose, 
Now here I lay, a shadow of myself, 
A ghost of the personality I had, 
A mask off charades I play, 
A card I choose everyday. 

How many layers exist inside, 
One happy, one sad, and one love derived.
An empty one, I push to fill;
The contents always fall out, 
Leaving me nauseated still. 

So a game i play everyday, 
Some chess, dress up, a disarray
Until I'm left to clean the mess, 
Only to realize I forgot which face I had.
Makeup for my personality, 
Until I don't have remover left.

So I layer it on, one by one,
Buried so deep I locked myself.
So much absence, what do I feel? 
What to leave and what to heal;

But passes another day, 
With my masks and disarray,
As they say, you have to pretend to actually fall asleep, 
So I go manic, wether too much or too less to feel,
The mask might melt but it's glued so deep, 
Taking it off is too much to see

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