Layla Riley-Hill Poet Free verse

Love was a fantasy she couldn't have

She wanted to be loved
A desire that haunted her dreams
She wanted to feel worthy
The type of worth that could only come -
From a romantic love 
Her heart ached with a sadness
That maybe love would never come, due to her blackness
She wondered - 
Would she forever walk alone
Trapped in a body no one could love

Everyday she wasn't loved, 
Parts of her soul had broke 
She despised the fact - that she was stuck
In a body empty of luck
What would she have to do -
To be -
Beautiful?

She had so much love to give, yet -
Despite that fact, it felt like one thing was holding her back
Maybe it was because she was black

Would she ever be loved -
Or was she doomed from the start
The strings of fate, slowly pulling her apart
Until pain takes the place of her heart -
Just a broken piece of disposable art

She would straighten out her flaws,
Hoping to become more acceptable
But deep down she knew,
How could someone love her if she couldn't love herself?
But how could she love herself when no one loved her?
Maybe she was just completely unlovable 
What was the point of living, when she was so broken?

She yearned for a life not of her own
One where she didn't have to question if he likes black girls 
Wondering if she was enough to be taken home
Or forever wandering around the streets, all alone
The streets haunted by her wails and moans -
Wondering why it can't be her, wondering when it will be her turn

But, she was a realist, that's who she was
She saw the world for what it is and what it's not 
She understood -
That being black and a woman
Meant love for her wouldn't be an easy run

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